#37 - Bumper

Dear readers (all 8 of you) I apologise for my laziness, but it's chronic. It's a disability really. Unfortunately people have little sympathy for it, espcially when it comes to giving out cash. So, with that out of the way, time to write. So, in optimistic fashion. Let's start with good news:

Owen Hargreaves (pictured) could be finally closer to to a return to reserves for his first game since 1984 for the Reserves against Mancester City Reserves. For those of you who don't remember Owen Hargreaves he was a catalyst in the 07-08 season as was capable of this. Also, he has the permission to shag many, many men's wives.

And the bad news, Michael Owen has been confirmed to be out for the rest of the season after his hamstring injury. He joins Anderson and John O'Shea who will also be missing over our most important period. Fortunately for Owen he's scored against City and in a League Cup final. Which is pretty good for a freebie who everyone expected to totally flop.

There's been some blame given to the pitch at Wembley stadium for the damage done to Mickey Owen. The pitch has declined to comment.

But, to go back to good news now and mess with your emotional stability. Kiko "Hard Bastard" Macheda could be back shortly too. The angular-faced italian will always be loved for this. With Welbeck out on loan and Owen out now, Macheda has only Diouf to compete with to get on the bench if Rooney and Berbatov are to start. This could will be the time for the little italian to show what he's made of.

So, how about last weekend then ey? Many people blame the Glazers for the ridiculous amount of debt but perhaps the price of silver polish and trophy cabinets are much more than we can imagine. As another League Cup is picked up and added to the list. For those who are counting, we are now 3 domestic trophies ahead of Liverpool and 39 ahead of Manchester City. That's a nice stat. You don't hear that on Match of the Day.

So. Is it time to start claiming that Wayne Rooney is the best striker in the world? Or has he been for some time?

For those interested in that kind of stuff, there was international football midweek. International friendlies even, to add to the tedium of it all. I can never get the spirit to talk about it. I do enjoy them and I do watch them, but like 90% of US sitcoms, my mind is entirely blank afterwards.

Nani has recommended Miguel Veloso for United sign. Unlike many other people who would recommend him, Nani has actually seen him play and didn't just sign him once on Football Manager. Sporting Clube de Portugal have been rather dire this season (despite their 3-0 wins over Porto and Everton recently) and now if anytime would be the best time to swoop for their players. Joao Moutinho is still excellent too. Then again, with Sporting recently becoming City's feeder club, would they be ok with selling players to us?

Oh, for those of you wanting to hear something about the Red Knights/MUST vs. Glazers confrontation. I couldn't tell you. I'm financially dyslexic. That's why I'm poor. This sadly has leg to the non-Sport members of the press to try and come up with football related puns to sound cool and hip with the normally uninterested football fans who will now be following. And embarassing like a Dad who tries to talk like Fresh Prince in front of his son's friends.

This blog was brought to you by;

• Playing Heavy Rain.
• Looking forward to Final Fantasy XIII.
• Having no John Terry jokes to tell because everyone's already said them all.